Where I Throw Myself a Pity Party

Friday June 8, 2012
In general life here is good.  We have a roof over our heads and food on the table, the boys are happy and healthy, and I have a job with great security.  But sometimes there are days like today were little things add up and take their toll and I just need to have a pity party, be  prepared for some whining. 

Our finances have been stressing me out a lot lately.  My husband is a stay at home Dad, and it is a situation that everyone loves, but it has hard living off of only one income.  Although to be fair if both of us were working than almost 100% of one of our paychecks would go to daycare for the boys.  Either way though money is tight, and there are needs and wants that can't be met.  It's been pretty stressful for me lately, especially since I'm the one handling our budget.  It's also sad to look at your budget the day you get paid and realize that almost all of your money is already spoken for. 

One of my very favorite cousins got married today, and we had to miss it.  He only lives about 8 hours away, but right now it could be half way around the world, it wouldn't have made a difference.  I had a hard time dealing with the fact, and before work today had a hard time just keeping it together.

I have also been stressing a lot lately about the possibility of having my gallbladder out.  My Dr. thinks that has been all of my stomach issues.  And let me tell you, at this point I am just ready to feel better.  I am tired of having an upset tummy almost daily.  Some days are better than others, and some days are really just horrible.  About a week and a half ago I had an abdominal ultrasound where there looked at all sorts of my internal organs.  It was pretty neat watching it, although not nearly as much fun as when you're pregnant.  I finally found out on Tuesday that everything came back looking just fine.  Yay I guess... I was honestly hoping they would find something and tell me to go have my gallbladder out.  Now I have to go have a HIDA scan which I am NOT looking forward to.   I get an iv and then injected with glowy dye.  I have to lay on a table for over an hour while they take pictures of how my body processes the dye.  It will simulate me eating a really fatty meal.  And my body really doesn't handle that well.  I fully expect to feel like total crap after having this test.  Work has already suggested I take the day off to do it (they will give me a sick day), and to do it on a Friday so I have the weekend to recuperate if needed.

It didn't help that my shift at work turned out to be absolutely hellish.  We were incredibly busy and equally short staffed.  The manager on duty ended up spending about 90% of the evening helping out in the pharmacy and we were still going under.  At 10pm I pretty much literally ran out of work and didn't look back.  I kept counting down the minutes to the end of my shift and telling myself that it was the weekend.  On my way home I stopped at Sonic for shakes, it helped a little. =)  

Thankfully Saturday was better.  The boys and I spent the afternoon and evening over at my in-laws doing laundry and swimming in the pool.  Owynn takes to the water like a fish; he looooves it.  He splashes and kicks and has such a great time.  Oliver did much better this time than the first time we went this summer.  He only cried for a few minutes when we got in the pool.  He warmed up to it pretty quickly, and he was even kicking and trying to bounce around in his little floaty.  We had a really good time.  John stayed home and spent the afternoon getting stuff done around the house (yay!) =)  Sunday should be fun too, we will be spending the evening with some great friends. 

 

It's been a LONG week

I am so glad it's the weekend!  It's been a long stressful week.  After dealing with some extra super nasty acid reflux problems over the weekend and some not so fun motion sickness, John pretty much told me I had to go see the Dr.  Well that and the fact that I have been having to take way more Phenergan than normal.  Phenergan is awesome, it makes my stomach feel so much better and is great for motion sickness, but it makes me so tired and out of it.  John needed a follow up too because he is still dizzy and it's been about a month now.  So I scheduled us for a Wednesday evening appointment; I love that our Dr has a late day.  I got my shift changed at work, so I worked from 8:30-5 then got home as fast as possible, grabbed John and the kids, then rushed off to Omaha to see the Dr. at 6:15pm.  I was expecting the Dr to give John something to help his dizziness more and tell me that there wasn't much they could do and maybe try a new acid reflux medication.  Well boy was I wrong!  John has labyrinth-itis and has to let it run its course.  As for me, the Dr thinks that most of my problems stem from my gallbladder and maybe I should get it out.  Well angry four letter words...I don't want another surgery, but it would be soooooo nice not to have a stomach that hurts all the time and no more pain in my back.  Our Dr also said that there is a good chance that if I have it out it could help my motion sickness, which would be amazing!    Right now I am getting car sick way too often and I HATE it.  To me being nauseous and vomiting is like the worst thing in the world.  I avoid it at all possible costs.  Now I have to get up way early on Wednesday morning and head to the hospital to have an abdominal ultrasound.  They are checking for gallstones and I guess whatever else they can find or might be wrong in there.  So now I am all stressed, blech.

This morning I managed to get a lot done before work this afternoon!
- I dragged my butt out of bed early
- Talked to my Dr's office and scheduled my ultrasound
- Showered
- Worked on our budget
- Got the boys up, dressed, fed, and took the sheets off Oliver's bed because he wet through
- Took them to the grocery store to do some shopping including picking up something for dinner (yay me for thinking ahead)

I am pretty worn out now.  Work wasn't too bad though, we got new registers installed and I am excited about that ( I am such a dork!)  But they are so much better than our ancient systems were.  They are all touch screen and can do so much more, and are a lot faster.

This weekend should be lots of fun! Tomorrow is errand day, and I think we are going to take the boys to get haircuts.  It will be Owynn's first and Oliver's second.  I also need to do some grocery shopping and laundry.  Sunday though we are heading over to P&W's for a giant poker tournament.  I am super excited about that, plus we have a friend who is in town for the week from St. Louis!  It's going to be a lot of fun.  Well I suppose I should be off to bed, I have a long couple of days ahead of me.  I don't get the benefit of a long weekend, Monday is my holiday to work.  Which is ok, I volunteered for it, and it means I don't have to work 4th of July or Labor Day.  Oh no, Oliver woke up, night!